the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize