I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize