wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
