matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize