okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
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