allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
