At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
