She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
