That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize