He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
