I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
