i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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