but the lizard people decide everything anyway
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize