I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
