I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
