Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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