Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Randomize
