She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
bring money and cleavage
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Randomize
