I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize