Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Randomize
