i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
