So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
