Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
