I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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