Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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