that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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