Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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