they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
