I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I would fuck him just for his dog
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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