What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
And Iām prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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