After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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