Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Randomize
