hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
