Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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