I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Randomize
