Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i barfeds in our rink
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
