I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
How's work?
Spinning.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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