He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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