Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize