i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
Randomize
