Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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