If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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