i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
