It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
ttyl tear gas
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
