you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Blood and glitter go together right?
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Randomize
