Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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