I'm sorry my penis didn't work
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Randomize
