You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
My vagina just clenched in fear
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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