woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize