You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Randomize
